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What Is A Douche Bag?

NB: This applies equally to males and females. You know who you are, I hope. So what is a douche bag. Well it’s this week’s freak. This week’s freak show.  All prior plans derailed from the onslaught of one douche bag who flummoxes into view and obscures the light for a time.   A blowhard, who blows hard, and laughs hard and lies big. And you love it. You trip out in your delusional spaceship.   Until the thrill wear
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How To Get Laid Like A Rock Star

If you are a female all you need do is leave the house. You will likely get picked up on your way to the bar. All that nonsense about face paint and trendy clothes is lost on the heterosexual male. Just say, ‘Yes’. It’s that easy. I have the opportunity to speak with a multitude of musicians as I can pose as the press, and amongst the biographical questions I always drop in some research to add to the Large Ani
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Nile Rodgers, Duran Duran & Xperimento

I met Nile Rodgers winter of 1991. I was newly divorced and freshly hooked up with a hot-ass boyfriend with a ponytail and a bass guitar. After seven years of servitude to the husband whom I had adored and labored for, for sure, when I left him it wasn’t my first choice, it was my only choice. I was bereft but resolved. I packed him off to Italy, ostensibly meeting him there; a lie. We wrestled through tearful long d
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Beautiful Memory

You bite me, you wound me, bruise me. Intentionally. I construe this as love. But that’s my issue, not yours. I stand tall in the high grasses and you, large beast that you are, camouflaged on a branch, you see me. You are meant to. I lope and predictably you pursue. Uncoiling, bounding from your vantage point. I easily clear rivulets, I cut sharp turns but you are right on my flank. We gallop, we stir up cloudy flur
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Signs of Change

Seeking redemption, just in case, a scattergun approach to Zen, she collected her spare change and made for the church on Duval at Eaton Street. She reckoned the donation would in some primordial way ward off ill will.   She was modern, she was western, but on a primitive level she never conquered her superstitions. She believed in signs.   The route she chose from her home on Solaris Hill took her by Fausto’s Food P
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Wolves, Love, Wounds

Sometimes you stumble into a fit so right no introduction is necessary. Typical of the human is to take for granted and expect more. We always forget to remember that a time may come when what we know is no longer. You’ll lose the love of bad dogs and forge friendships with good wolves. As fate gives equally she takes. She closes some doors and chucks those keys deep into the turquoise sea. I heard a story abou
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Hurricane Spring Break

In my five years in Key West how often have I been asked, “What about hurricanes? Aren’t you afraid?” As if I ought not to consider being here on the off-chance I might be trapped in a downpour or pinned to a tree or drowned at sea. Living here is not quite so dangerous as the lip of an active volcano. Besides many factors are responsible for more deaths per year than hurricanes. Where should one live to avoid all na
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Butterflies

Just as with life itself sometimes town doesn’t deliver what you’re looking for. Sometimes it delivers what you need. A bat to the gut, something hard enough to shatter your soul cowering in the solar plexus. Down in the recesses where the butterflies flit and inflame the inner lining of your feelings. Have you ever been in a cloud of joy, in the thrall, deep in the moment and while you flexed in the comforts of love
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Miss Ex

He was in a castle, at a party. He was in an ancient room with walls of golden stone when dawn began squelching out shadows. As castles go it was one of the creepy types which crawl up the top tier of a Balkan mountain and vanish in the clouds. He remembers nothing except the noise, and he was knocked out.   Later he stood on a shimmering cobbled street. He had no money in his pockets and no key to his apartment. The
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